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MOM- The Standard Model

While the good Lord was creating mothers, He was well into his sixth day of overtime. Then an angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one!"

And the Lord said, "Have you read the specification on this order? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic... Have 180 movable parts, all replaceable... Run on black coffee and leftovers... have a lap that disappears when she stands up... and a kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair. Plus she has to have six pairs of hands!"

The angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands!!?? Not possible!"

"Oh, it's not the hands that are causing me the problem," said the Lord. "It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have."

"That's on the standard model?" asked the angel.

The Lord nodded. "One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, 'What are you kids doing in there?' when she already knows...Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn't , but what she has to know... And of course, the ones here in front that can look at a child and reflect, 'I understand, and I love you' without so much as saying a word."

"Lord," said the angel touching His sleeve gently, "Get some rest. Finish this tomorrow."

"I can't," answered the Lord. "I'm so close to creating something so close to Myself. Already I have one that heals herself when she's sick...can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger...and can get a nine-year old to stand under a shower."

The angel circled the model of the mother very slowly and sighed, "But it's too soft!"

"And yet she's tough!" said the Lord excitedly. "You cannot imagine what the mother can handle or do!"

"Can it think?" asked the angel.

"Not only can it think, but it can reason and compromise!" answered the Creator.

Finally the angel bent over and ran her fingers across the mother's cheek.

"There's a leak!" she pronounced. "I told you, you were trying to put too much in this model! You can't ignore the stress factor. "

This Lord moved in closer for a look and gently lifted the drop of moisture to His finger where it glistened and sparkled in the light. "It's not a leak," He said. "It's a tear."

"A tear?" asked the angel. "What's it for?"

"It's for Joy, Sadness, Disappointment, Compassion, Pain, Loneliness, and Pride."

And the angel exclaimed, "You're a genius!"

The Lord looked somber and replied, "I didn't put it there."

Found in the Erma Bombeck's column years ago. Author Unknown.

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